Respect dare series – day 10 – Do not contend

2 Timothy 2:14, 23-25a

Remind them of these things, and charge them before God not to quarrel about words, which does no good, but only ruins the hearers . . . Have nothing to do with foolish, ignorant controversies; you know that they breed quarrels. And the Lord’s servant must not be quarrelsome but kind to everyone, able to teach, patiently enduring evil, correcting his opponents with gentleness.

This might be an odd verse to put in here since I’m focusing on respect and marriage, but Glenn and I probably argue over Scripture more than anything else :p Sometimes I’m wrong, sometimes Glenn is wrong, sometimes we’re probably both wrong, or we can’t know for sure. But, more often than not . . . it simply doesn’t matter! They aren’t arguments that concern salvation.

So why do I let it turn into an argument? You see, I’m an INFP.

Side note: (If you don’t know Meyers-Briggs personality I’d highly recommend you look into it with your spouse; it has really helped Glenn and I to understand one another and to communicate better – a good quiz is

As an INFP, I’m usually pretty chill about life . . . until one of my core beliefs, or passions is stabbed . . . then the fighter comes out! One of my passions is the Word of God. And Glenn gets hit twice because another one of my core beliefs (that I’m working on changing) is that, as husband and wife, we should have the same theological beliefs.

So Glenn and I will disagree on something about the Word, which gets me defending my stance, but then I’ll get upset about it because I feel we shouldn’t have differing beliefs! Poor Glenn, he really is so patient with me!

To get back on track, God challenges me (once I’m calm again) to go and talk it through reasonably. God is helping me come to a place where I don’t get worked up in the first place, but for the moment the apology later is the usual way it goes . . .

My action for today: Yep, I had to go and apologise and talk through the subject of argument in an calm manner. I did well a couple of days ago and was calm throughout the discussion, but today was a step back to reacting first.

My prayer for today: Holy Spirit, close my mouth to arguments and dissension. Help me to have discussions with Glenn with all love and reasonableness. Let me be okay with not always holding the same opinion as him. Help us to discuss things lovingly with each other. Temper my spirit. Make me gentle in word and heart. Help me to be a patient and thoughtful listener. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Go look at some clouds, then go back and apologise!

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